Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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