Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
