i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Randomize
