Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
what day is it and did you see me today?
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize
