Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Im at target. Idk why I'm buying condoms AND a tutu for my cat. No one who dresses their cat up has ever gotten laid.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
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