I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
The bottle brush for the bong worked really well to clean the brownies out of the waffle maker.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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