wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Randomize
