There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Randomize
