I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
