My first STD was from a foam party
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
