We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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