And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
