Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
as a side note pls kill me
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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