so that wasnt chicken after all
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize