well I can't set my house on fire every night
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
