Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
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