Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Randomize
