But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
PS: I just woke up from my shower
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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