I can't watch pbs sober anymore
ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
But theres a keg here and me gusta
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
