which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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