Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Randomize
