Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Can you repeat that, but with context?
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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