i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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