Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Wesley from the Princess Bride. I kept telling him what I wanted him to do and all he would say was "as you wish"
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize
