First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize