bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
Randomize
