i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize