I don't think brook has ever known best
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
