I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
