You really coming over, don't trick.
In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
