i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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