Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
Randomize
