i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
i came on her dog
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Randomize
