There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Randomize
