i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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