Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
i ran into the Jo the housecleaner earlier this morning. i mentioned i had a little hangover and she asked what the occasion was.. i replied "Tuesday" without thinking. she judged the shit out of me.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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