I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
im holly from the hills drunk
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I got her a Nickelback box set.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
