We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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