What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
