you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
