Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
