Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
My vagina just clenched in fear
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
