I look better un-naked...
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
