ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
