...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
My breakfast consisted of a slimfast and an adderal. My fridge is like an insecurity buffet.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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