You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
