I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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