she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
