I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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