Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
he quoted the bible to break up with me
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
