ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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